(Silence… try it.)
Silence, in essence, is the absence of sound – the kind that emanates from our vocal cords. It is not to be confused with a pause, a writing tool used to create suspense or signal that what comes next matters.
Most of us are uncomfortable with silence.
Should I say something?
The opposite is true.
Silence is full of presence.
It demands attention and invites us to simply be, without needing to prove anything.
It carries weight.
“Silence is that pause, in which all possibilities exist.” – L.Middleton
“Silence is golden.” – Thomas Carlyle
The Sounds of Silence by Simon & Garfunkel
Silence feeds creativity. It encourages us to consider before responding. It sustains inner strength in a chaotic world and allows our words to land more intentionally.
It provides an opportunity to withdraw and reflect, activating the parasympathetic nervous system – the body’s natural counter to fight or flight – and allowing space for clarity and solution.
In conversation, silence buys time.
It allows both speaker and listener to form a response that is thoughtful rather than reactive.
There is, however, a shadow side to silence.
When used to manipulate, silence becomes something else entirely – not a pause, but a withdrawal. It can be used to shut down dialogue or avoid opposing views.
And yet, there are times when choosing not to speak is wise.
Silence can calm the flames of a difficult conversation.
It can be a boundary – a conscious decision not to engage, especially in the presence of anger or harm.
In these moments, silence is not avoidance. It is restraint.
Silence as an Art
How do we practice the art of silence?
Full disclosure… use it.
• Allow the uncomfortable pause in conversation to become a comfortable space.
• Take a few breaths before responding – to anything and everything.
• Spend time each day within it, indoors or out.
• Begin to see silence not as emptiness, but as a companion.
• Meditation is one path into silence – its value is best understood through experience.
The Silence Reset
When the urge to fill space arises:
1. Notice
The discomfort is present.
You don’t need to escape it.
2. Breathe
Slow your breath. Let the moment settle.
3. Allow
Resist the need to speak immediately. Let silence do some of the work.
4. Choose
Speak only if it adds value. Otherwise, let the silence stand.
Silence is not empty.
It is a space where clarity forms.
Why give silence a place in this series?
There is a reason people seek it out – and even pay for it – in the form of silent retreats.
In a world that constantly asks us to respond, silence offers something rare:
The chance to listen.
As Simon & Garfunkel reminded us in The Sound of Silence,
silence is not empty – it is often where truth is waiting to be heard.
